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171 | Along the Road to Healing - Stacee & Shawn Shannon

Stacee describes her current state of being as her motherhood era. She has birthed two of their children with her husband, and to look at them now you would have no clue what it took to get here. Conception did not come easy. Childbirth brought its challenges. Postpartum complications nearly ended it all. Stacee and Shawn’s family was forged in the fire. Stacee and her husband, Shawn, held strong to not only each other but to their dream of adding to their family as well.

While Shawn and Stacee’s story details two live births, their first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage. A miscarriage that has allowed Stacee to be empathetic of those who have endured similar experiences. She talked about the feelings of isolation and loneliness that is matched with the mystery of miscarriages. The inexplicable loss of a child whose life is not yet deemed viable and the lack of compassion in medical settings as it’s happening.

Welcoming a new life into the world is a joyous occasion, but the postpartum period can bring about various health complications for mothers. While many women and birthing people experience a smooth recovery after childbirth, it’s essential to be aware of potential challenges and seek timely medical attention when needed.

Excessive bleeding after childbirth, known as postpartum hemorrhage, can be life-threatening. Healthcare providers closely monitor mothers for signs of hemorrhage and may intervene with medications or, in severe cases, surgical procedures to control bleeding. Stacee found herself faced with this after her first birth. Her immediate postpartum journey started with stabilizing her daughter's blood sugar levels which led to the discovery that she had a rare condition that not only needed special treatment but a specific medical team an hour away from where they lived. They took a medical flight, while Stacee was barely able to acknowledge any of her own needs. During that trip, as her daughter was getting the help she needed at a pediatric hospital; Stacee eventually went to the hospital next door for her own care. They discovered that she still had sponges inside of her from her surgical birth and was having a postpartum hemorrhage.

Pause. Breathe. Sit.

The emotional enormity of a near-miss affects everyone in the family. Stacee is here to share her story. Shawn is here to share his vantage point of their story. Their babies are here to love their mother. Stacee and Shawn’s words carry the weight.

161 | NICU Grad to Advocate - Mya Morenzoni

After a high blood pressure read at 20 weeks gestation, Mya started care with Maternal Fetal Medicine out of an abundance of caution. Seven weeks later, she would report to the hospital with a headache, feeling sick, and an even higher blood pressure reading, ultimately diagnosed with preeclampsia. Mya, a registered nurse, immediately knew her birth would be different than expected. Her doula met her at the hospital, as she was still being monitored and trying to keep the baby in utero as long as possible. Mya faced many decisions regarding her care about how she wanted to deliver her daughter; vaginal induced birth or surgical birth. She decided on a surgical birth. Mya wanted her husband to be engaged in the process by being able to cut the cord. During delivery, she was still managing her blood pressure through medications, magnesium sulfate, and Labetalol. The magnesium sulfate was hard on her body as it caused nausea, and she wasn't allowed to eat during administration. Balancing different rooms to stabilize her blood pressure and monitoring; went on for eight days until her daughter was born. Mya noted that administering medication for a patient versus being the patient was a very different experience. She had to step out of her "nurse mind" to be able to advocate for herself.

As baby Aria's umbilical cord showed signs of inadequate blood flow; Mya initiated the request for her cesarean birth. She would enter the world healthy, screaming with her eyes wide open. She weighed a little over a pound and was rushed to the NICU with her father. Mya stayed at the hospital for three additional days. She was ready to go home for rest and nourishment, but it was gut-wrenching to have to leave her daughter at the hospital. Thankfully, she had started pumping and was able to deliver several tubes of colostrum to the NICU before leaving.

Mya's birth experience has allowed her to become more vulnerable. She confided in her husband and parents that she was not okay and leaned into them for support. She shared the term NICU PTSD and the effects it can have on new parents. Mya had to face the reality that her child might not come home. Therapy was her saving grace to cope with anxiety and concerns about Aria.

From her own experience, Mya is creating a virtual safe space for moms to connect. Advising new parents as a trained doula Mya has developed a list of tips for expectant families. Start with researching providers, hire a doula to support you and prepare you for birth, learn about the NICU facility in the hospital, and hire a lactation consultant that makes you feel comfortable. You can connect with more of Mya's journey and support offerings here.

Hospital Birth, NICU, PostpartumLaurel GourrierDecember 22, 2022Comment

141 | Forged in the Storm - Letitia & Brandon Gordon

Letitia and Brandon Gordon discovered they were expecting their second child when she was in nursing school. She found herself in a season of busyness and wanted to complete as much schoolwork as possible while managing her own business and their family.

Much to their surprise, Letitia started noticing signs of labor when she was 28 weeks gestation. After informing her doctor of her concerns, her provider assured her that it was not labor and shouldn’t be concerned. Her doctor was dismissive; that’s a common issue when we talk to Black women who have had complications in their pregnancies and labor. Unfortunately, Letitia was right; she was in labor and would report to the hospital the next day. Fear and panic kicked in, and her husband was a steady source of comfort and grounding as they prepared to welcome their second son unexpectedly early.

Letitia’s birth experience altered her career path, as she planned to be a psychiatric nurse. She’s now a labor and delivery nurse, trained birth doula, and a midwifery student. She brings hope, comfort, and support to expectant families with her own lives experiences and skills.

Letitia opened up about a new battle, breast cancer, during our interview. She is undergoing treatment and maintaining her family and professional responsibilities. Many of you know the toll that cancer treatment can take on a family and their finances. We have an ask - if you feel moved to support Letitia and her family, please listen to her birth story, and donate to her GoFundMe account.

123 | Living the Promise - Carrita Flie

Carrita Flie graciously opened up to us about both her miscarriages and birth. This was the first time Carrita shared the details of both her traumatic losses and one amazing blessing. Due to her history, her third pregnancy was heavily monitored. She worked with maternal-fetal medicine in addition to a regular OB as she was considered high-risk. They discovered that her cervix had thinned at 21 weeks and had a cerclage placed to help keep her from delivering her baby early. It was difficult to hear that if her water broke during the procedure, there would be no life-saving efforts for the baby due to "point of viability" gestational age, which can vary from 20-24 weeks in different areas. Her planning was minimal as she could only focus on having a living, breathing child at birth. The plan was survival.

Carrita reached 26 weeks and attended her regular prenatal appointment, and it was without incident. When she arrived home, she started to notice regular contractions and eventually lost her mucus plug. She called her husband for support and was taken to the hospital. The nurse at the hospital immediately dismissed her concerns and denied that she was in labor. The doctor on call completed a cervical exam and confirmed what Carrita already knew. Carrita had reported to the ER three times before that day and was angered at how she could have been better served by the staff and possibly prevented the premature birth. She had a brief encounter with her baby after his emergency surgical birth by way of a resounding cry. He was whisked away to the NICU for care, and Carrita remained in the operating room with her health issues. It was traumatic as she felt everything happening to her body as her epidural had started to weaken. A Black nurse was present with her in the operating room that she credits as being an angel to her and kept her safe from potential harm as her doctor was trying to manage her care.

Postpartum was stressful as she was pumping for her newborn and studying for her finals in her postgraduate program. The NICU stay began snowballing as her baby battled respiratory issues and infections that led to life support measures. The road to recovery and healing would be long for both Carrita and her husband while they were both on their trajectories. The space to pause was delayed for over a year as their family managed the health concerns. Today, Carrita can see not only where she was but who she is now mentally and physically. Their son Isaac, named after the promised son to Abraham and is growing, healthy, and strong after enduring multiple surgeries and therapies.

88 | Joy & Sorrow Can Occupy the Same Space - Dani Kilgore

This is a story that includes loss - In memory of William Jr.

Dani describes her story as a faith journey to motherhood - a journey that has included pain, joy but also lots of hope. In 2010, a year into their marriage Dani and her husband found out they were pregnant. Yet early into this pregnancy, they would experience a miscarriage. Processing through that, they decided to wait before trying again, and three years later, Dani was pregnant. They found out it was a boy and knew they wanted to name him William Jr. after her husband. But at 28 weeks, September 2013, her placenta would stop working, and William Jr. was born. But William's time earthside would be short, and after a hard fight, he would pass that November.

The passing of their son was extremely difficult for them. Working through their grief, they leaned into their family, friends, and support through therapy. During this time, they were connected with the March of Dimes. For Dani, March of Dimes provider her with the hope she needed. Connecting with other families with the same shared experience allowed them all to know they were not navigating this alone. Participating in the March of Dimes walk allows her and her husband to honor their son and the children they never met.

This support and hope carried them through another miscarriage in 2014 and then becoming pregnant with their daughter Harper in 2015. Understanding her health history, Dani and her husband decided with their care team to have a surgical birth with Harper at 35 weeks. As a result of being born premature, she was diagnosed with Sensorineural hearing loss (SNHL) - where audio fibers in her ear either didn't develop or did and died. Because of that, she does wear bilateral hearing aids. But as Dani described beyond that, "she is doing well" and a "sign that miracles can happen!"

Hospital Birth, NICU, LossLaurel GourrierJanuary 28, 2021Comment

87 | A Mother's Work - Oriel McKinney

Oriel started her pregnancy as being relatively normal and without issues. Her and her husband prepared by taking all of the new parent classes with excitement and curiosity. Her story took an abrupt shift when her blood pressure started increasing, and she found herself being treated with medication and was not aware of the cause.

The issues with high blood pressure found her needing additional advocacy by her mother, an experienced nurse. Her mother refused to allow her daughter’s health issues to be brushed off or delayed treatment. She shared how her treatment shifted as her language matched those of the medical field. She was admitted to the hospital for further monitoring, which led to an emergency surgical birth at 33 weeks, as her baby didn’t pass the assessments.

Oriel had a feeling of Deja Vu as she carried her second child. Things were going well, and she treated herself to a maternity shoot as she surpassed the 33-week mark. However, she was met with more blood pressure challenges and needed to deliver her daughter just short of being full term at 36 weeks.

Challenges with preeclampsia marked both pregnancies and influenced some postpartum life changes that have led the way for a healthier life for Oriel. She shared her journey as a NICU parent and how she never paused for her healing, as is common for parents with special needs children. Now Oriel stands by scheduling time for herself and has the support of her partner to honor it. Listen in for a story about the incredible power of advocacy and resilience.

Hospital Birth, Cesarean Birth, NICULaurel GourrierJanuary 21, 2021NiCU Families, Birth Advocacy, Surgical BirthComment

85 |There is Always Room for Healing - Anese Barnett

When Anese and her husband found out they were pregnant, it was not only a surprise but extremely exciting. They were caught off guard when at ten weeks, her pregnancy would shift into high risk as she was diagnosed with a short cervix, making her susceptible to preterm labor. At 20 weeks, her doctor indicated they would need to make some serious changes to help maintain the chances of that occurring. These changes included strict bed rest and a treatment plan for a cerclage (cervical stitch) placed.

Anese would be met with the unexpected again, at 31 weeks when her water broke, resulting in a 2-week hospital stay, and at 33 weeks going into spontaneous labor. While labor wasn't long, pushing her son earthside did take an extended amount of time, and after 2 hours and birth vacuum assistance, she and her husband got to meet their 3lb baby boy. When reflecting on her experience, Anese shared that she was thankful to have had a birth team that gave her the space to try. Many plans for her birth had changed; she hadn't thought about that impact until she was in the moment having it all unfold. But her birth team made sure she was informed, and all options were considered.

This type of support would continue as her family adjusted to life in the NICU. After five weeks, they were able to bring their son home. And as they celebrate year two of his life, healing continues and is just beginning for some family members. The layers of healing have allowed Anese to create support systems for other mothers with her similar experience. It has created a deeper bond for her husband and son and created space for her father to share his experience. Lastly, it sheds light on just how impactful full family-centered and focused care can be.

76 | A Journey Towards Healing: Motherhood After Loss - Alishia Anderson

This is a story about loss - In memory of Derek Jerrell Anderson Jr., aka DJ

Alishia Anderson shares that motherhood has stretched her in ways she didn't even know she could be stretched. That the lessons she has taken from her journey are that "motherhood is very unpredictable, and having living children is an underrated blessing!"

Her motherhood journey was turned upside down as within her first pregnancy at 28 weeks, during a routine ultrasound appointment, they discovered her son no longer had a heartbeat. Needing time to process, Alishia and her husband decided to move forward with induction for the next day. That evening they prepared to meet their son, researching what it meant to lose a baby this early, the name for their experience, and trying to gain some sense of what to expect. After three days of labor, she gave birth to her angel baby Derrek Jerrell Anderson Jr., aka DJ. The groundwork that a supportive nurse provided in helping her understand the reality of what postpartum would look like as a stillbirth survivor was something Alishia found to be fundamental in finding healing and also navigating becoming a parent again.

A year later, Alisha and her husband would add their rainbow baby Grayson to their family and their golden baby Gavin two and a half years after that. And each story bringing its twists and turns but embracing everything within them.

72 | Collective Resolve - Erica Butler

Erica Butler, founder, and Sex Educator for Happ E. SexTalk, an education consulting company focused on challenging the media and cultural messages pertaining to female sexuality, body image, and sexual pleasure – specifically the historically negative and hypersexualized images of Black female sexuality. Erica shared her birth story with us, discussed her work and its importance in reproductive health and justice.

She opened up about both of her pregnancies. The first pregnancy was without complications and only mild nausea but eventually led to an emergency surgical birth. Her personal connection to a local doula organization, ROOTT, allowed her and her husband to envision birth with a new lens during her second pregnancy. Despite her best plans and she was met with placenta previa that would lead to a scheduled surgical birth. The delivery went well, but the postpartum experience was met with low blood sugar levels, lactation issues, medical provider issues, and anxiety. Erica and her husband, David, leaned into their own strength and village for support to help them.

58 | Story of Malachi: Living Through Loss - Crystall Boatwright

This is a story about loss - In memory of Malachi Cayden Boatwright

Crystall was 28 weeks before she found out she was pregnant. and there were some daunting concerns about the baby's health. They spent the rest of the day through testing and trying to process all the information. Malachi was born 7lbs, eyes bright and open taking in his parents. After some time in NICU, he transitioned with his father rocking and singing to him. Crystall is honest that it was tough and painful to try and go back to what was. As she put it, how do you explain to people what you went through and what you're going through - "There is no baby in me and no baby in my arms."

Crystall attributes that the place she is currently on her journey is due to finding community and other families that had walked in her shoes. Others allowed her to share her truth, all parts of it without question, and with lots of love. There is healing in community, there is support in community, and there is always space in community - in whatever capacity you may need it.

56 | Stay the Course - Gabrielle Burks

From the beginning, Gabrielle and her fiance knew with the birth of their son; they were going to do things differently this time around. They hired a doula, hired a midwife, and began preparing for their homebirth. Yet seven months into their pregnancy, they were hit with the news that their midwife wouldn't be able to support them, and they had to go back to the drawing board. They visited different hospitals until they found one that felt right and enrolled in a nine-week intensive birth class. In this class, not only did they learn about childbirth but how to control their care, work with sand speak with their care providers to ensure that all decisions were based on and from informed consent. The lessons learned from this class would be vital in their advocacy and care during and after their son's birth.

Her son was born, but not breathing - care providers eventually revived him, but due to the length of time he was without oxygen, they were unsure if he would make it through the night. Gabrielle made that doctor eat his words, pray with her and her family, and demanded that no stone go unturned in her son's care. Her experience highlights the dark parts of birth, the parts we hope never happen, and yet it brings forth what can happen when you have the pieces to be empowered and use them fully.

43 | Saul's Light - Kimberly Novod

This is a story about loss - In memory of Saul

With no early indication, in 2014, Kimberly and Aaron Novod's son, Saul, was born prematurely at twenty-eight weeks and six days. He was whisked to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). Initially, they thought he was going to do well and would be bringing their baby home. Yet, baby Saul passed after twenty days in the NICU due to a brain bleed. As a way to process through their grief and work on healing, Kimberly and her husband Aaron created Saul's Light. During their time of need, their community surrounded them in love and support, which was an integral part of their healing process. Thus, making it their mission to provide the same outpouring to all NICU and bereaved families. A vital part of the support provided to families is through mobilizing people, organizations, and resources directly from their community.

In the sharing of her birth story, Kimberly makes it clear and points that we cannot ignore the disparities that black and brown babies are overrepresented in the NICU and the graveyard. When parents are present for their babies and present in their care, they have better outcomes. Saul's Light allows for families to have that, responsive to the whole experience of NICU and also addressing infant mortality. It is a communal embrace, reminding families that their community cares about them, and they're not alone!

04 | Surviving the NICU - Nicole Braddy

Nicole Braddy is sharing her family's story of faith and promises kept through the birth of her first child. Nicole and her husband, Bryan, were married in January and soon learned they were expecting their first child together. She loves to share their story as an opportunity to teach other families about the onset and complications of preeclampsia and navigating the NICU. The Braddy family was able to endure a harrowing experience that left them feeling victorious and strengthened as a new family.

Hospital Birth, NICULaurel GourrierFebruary 12, 2018Preterm Birth Comments

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