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173 | The Journey Pregnancy App - Courtney Williams

Our guest, CEO of Emagine Solutions Technology Courtney Williams, is the creator of The Journey Pregnancy App. The app enables patients to vital signs during pregnancy and then transmits this information in real-time and creates a record. Beyond that it issues a call to action for users to contact their providers when they enter vitals that are out of bounds based on ACOG standards. This technology was developed after Courtney experienced Postpartum Preeclampsia, a rare condition that occurs when you have high blood pressure and excess protein in your urine soon after childbirth. She was already working in maternal health technology.

Courtney’s pregnancy started in 2019; she gave birth at the height of the first wave of the pandemic in 2020. The pregnancy started well; she ate right and worked out daily. But the gym access stopped due to the pandemic - unfortunately, this was a major stress reliever for Courtney. She also utilized acupuncture with a naturopathic provider. Eventually, she lost access to that support due to growing concerns due to the pandemic. It had been helpful for morning sickness; this was another hit to her emotional support.

A week before the childbirth, Courtney's son measured big and they were scheduled for a surgical birth; which she was ok with because it eased her uncertainty. Unfortunately, the hospital would not allow her doula to be present. Courtney’s husband was her sole support during the birth and everything went well as they welcomed their son. In the hours and days after the birth, her body started swelling. Courtney presented with a headache and pronounced chest pain five days postpartum. She attempted to contact her provider but did not get a response; she decided to go to the emergency room, where she was diagnosed with Postpartum Preeclampsia. After returning home, she needed to report to her doctor’s office multiple days in a week for blood pressure readings. This brought about challenges in their breastfeeding/pumping journey. Courtney was surprised that there wasn't technology to ease the challenges for new parents to go to frequent appointments during the early phases of postpartum.

We will save ourselves. We have everything we need within ourselves to rebuild birth better. Being active participants in our care, engaging providers who acknowledge and respect our voices, and equipping ourselves with innate knowledge and an understanding of how our unique bodies respond to pregnancy are key components in creating safer, joy-filled birth experiences.

Hospital Birth, Postpartum, Community Highlights, COVID-19, Cesarean BirthLaurel GourrierMarch 28, 2024Birth Advocacy, Birthing During COVID, Birth Tech, Pregnancy Guide, Postpartum Preeclampsia, Surgical BirthComment

172 | Trusting Intuition, Rooted in Autonomy - Emoni Cobb

Home Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierJanuary 10, 2024ROOTT Doulas, Home Birth Family, Black Doulas, Postpartum Support, Postpartum DoulaComment

171 | Along the Road to Healing - Stacee & Shawn Shannon

Stacee describes her current state of being as her motherhood era. She has birthed two of their children with her husband, and to look at them now you would have no clue what it took to get here. Conception did not come easy. Childbirth brought its challenges. Postpartum complications nearly ended it all. Stacee and Shawn’s family was forged in the fire. Stacee and her husband, Shawn, held strong to not only each other but to their dream of adding to their family as well.

While Shawn and Stacee’s story details two live births, their first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage. A miscarriage that has allowed Stacee to be empathetic of those who have endured similar experiences. She talked about the feelings of isolation and loneliness that is matched with the mystery of miscarriages. The inexplicable loss of a child whose life is not yet deemed viable and the lack of compassion in medical settings as it’s happening.

Welcoming a new life into the world is a joyous occasion, but the postpartum period can bring about various health complications for mothers. While many women and birthing people experience a smooth recovery after childbirth, it’s essential to be aware of potential challenges and seek timely medical attention when needed.

Excessive bleeding after childbirth, known as postpartum hemorrhage, can be life-threatening. Healthcare providers closely monitor mothers for signs of hemorrhage and may intervene with medications or, in severe cases, surgical procedures to control bleeding. Stacee found herself faced with this after her first birth. Her immediate postpartum journey started with stabilizing her daughter's blood sugar levels which led to the discovery that she had a rare condition that not only needed special treatment but a specific medical team an hour away from where they lived. They took a medical flight, while Stacee was barely able to acknowledge any of her own needs. During that trip, as her daughter was getting the help she needed at a pediatric hospital; Stacee eventually went to the hospital next door for her own care. They discovered that she still had sponges inside of her from her surgical birth and was having a postpartum hemorrhage.

Pause. Breathe. Sit.

The emotional enormity of a near-miss affects everyone in the family. Stacee is here to share her story. Shawn is here to share his vantage point of their story. Their babies are here to love their mother. Stacee and Shawn’s words carry the weight.

Cesarean Birth, Hospital Birth, Infertility, NICU, PostpartumLaurel GourrierNovember 29, 2023Emergency Surgical Birth, Postpartum Hemorrhage, Miscarriage Stories Comment

170 | Building it Better - Esther McCant

Esther McCant, founder and CEO of Metro Mommy Agency, opened up about her five pregnancies, which included a miscarriage that would push her to self-advocate with her medical provider.

Esther’s first pregnancy happened within the first few months of her marriage. Six weeks later, she learned that she had a blighted ovum and her provider prepared her to miscarry. She had the choice to let the ovum pass or go to the hospital for a DNC. She stayed home as long as she could but eventually went to the hospital. Esther recalled the doctor taking quite a while to see her, and when she did she insisted that Esther still needed a DNC even though everything had passed. She felt threatened by the doctor about the potential that she could bleed out. This interaction helped Esther to trust herself. She chose to leave and go home. The grieving process started; she became pregnant again within a few months. The hospital miscarriage experience led her to want to explore other birthing options. Her sister-in-law invited her to her calming water birth; which helped her see a new vision. Esther found a midwife who resonated with her and a doula who could support her choices. The midwife was able to support her in a birthing center. Baby would arrive with a nuchal hand and in the OP position by squatting.

The third pregnancy brought on changes that would impact her nutrition, wellness, and the birthing environment she desired; which included a water birth. Feminine energy filled the birthing space by inviting her sisters-in-law. Her son’s birth was challenging as she had back labor. She regrets not getting chiropractic care and having a doula this time. Postpartum was filled with engaging with other women as opposed to the more isolating experience she had after her first birth. They had moved from Florida to Alabama, and the difference in provider options was vastly different.

When Esther thought she was in labor they made the two-and-a-half-hour trek to Chattanooga to no avail as the baby was not ready. They turned the trip into a babymoon and would make the trip again a couple of days later. Esther and her husband brought the kids along to meet up with her family who would care for them. They didn’t make it there on time due to a flat tire problem. Esther gave birth within 6 hours of leaving their home and although she felt distracted by having the other children there and wondering where her family was. Esther’s Haitian roots welcomed the Haitian bath, teas, and essential oils, and started the restoration process with her mother coming to support her.

When Esther had her fourth son, she was a trained birth doula. She envisioned a waterbirth with her partner, two midwives, and two doulas present. The birth and pregnancy were heavy in dealing with the ongoing race issues in our country and the experiences of Black men and boys. Giving herself space to release those feelings during long labor allowed her to relax in her body and give birth smoothly. Her vision would come true as she delivered her son in a haze of joy.

Birth Center, Community Highlights, Home Birth, Postpartum, WaterbirthLaurel GourrierOctober 16, 2023Doula of Color, Midwifery CareComment

165 | Shades of Blue - Kay Matthews

This is a story that includes loss - In memory of Troya Simone

Kay’s expectation of pregnancy was to feel joy. Her life was falling into place the way she wanted it to regarding her personal and professional life. She inquired about the effects of her workload and the pregnancy. Her provider said as long as she felt good, she could continue working the way she had been. Despite her provider's reassurance, she decided to start scaling back her work as a chef/entrepreneur. A few weeks later, she started feeling bad while she was at a party. She had a high pain tolerance and found herself pushing through without seeking help, submitting to the strong Black woman persona. The pain continued, and Kay called 911; she woke up in the ICU. Kay lost her baby. She lost the joy in her pregnancy. Her daughter was stillborn. She couldn’t hold her, not because she wasn't allowed but because she didn’t want to; there was a disconnect. Ten years later, she still feels that loss.

Life after the loss was harder than the loss. The words of her friends and family weren’t comforting. The idea of another opportunity to be pregnant again didn’t soothe or heal her. Give it time; tough words that proved to be isolating. The help she needed was hard to explain. She couldn’t articulate what she needed even when people asked her directly. Kay described herself as a broken plate without enough glue to put it back together.

A rebirth at 7-8 months postpartum saved Kay. She could feel herself withering away. The domino effect of infant loss started and shifted her community, the loss of things and people, friendships, and relationships, including her partner. They had to separate and rebuild from scratch after Kay spent some time to herself in deep healing. Journaling her feelings helped her explore her patterns and how to dictate the outcomes of her days. She started asking people about their birth stories, which opened the door for people to talk about their losses, abortions, joy, and pain. Kay saw the mental health needs of birthing people as a new cause to fight and build for. Her life as a chef was winding down as she fulfilled her commitments without the love for the work.

Kay’s passion for Black Maternal Mental Health grew The Shades of Blue Project. Centering the experience of birth and not the outcome is inclusive and not isolating. Social support in the form of diapers, formula, etc. Mental health support for losses of all types, miscarriages, stillbirths, and abortions. Creating safe spaces that are accessible for the people, decreasing barriers to resources, help serve those who need it most. A beautiful boutique designed to empower its clients to be engaged in their own experiences with dignity. What you do for yourself helps you serve others. This year (2023) the Black Maternal Mental Health Week, created and hosted by Kay and The Shades of Blue Project, will continue their I.N.S.P.I.R.E. Method training. The intention is to provide compassionate care methods specifically for women of color and minorities, which doulas can implement, midwives, clinicians, and those facilitating support groups.

Community Highlights, Hospital Birth, Loss, PostpartumLaurel GourrierFebruary 4, 2023Comment

164 | A Sigh of Relief - Jenni & Bryson Moore

Creatives Jenni & Bryson had built a life together, centering their work in music and writing before their baby girl joined the family. Their pregnancy journey started with extreme nausea for Jenni. She sought medical support for her discomfort and found relief in prescription nausea medication. Jenni was interested in midwifery care but was “risked out” due to blood pressure issues. However, she was able to find medical providers that met her needs.

Deep-seated fear surrounding dying during childbirth under the care of hospital providers had settled into Jenni’s psyche. Routine prenatal appointments left her second-guessing the information she received from her providers. Jenni reached out to other Black medical and birth professionals for reassurance and additional information. The challenges of being a pregnant Black woman felt mentally heavy, constantly trying to read between the lines and discern information for accuracy. She found herself being very direct when with her care providers as she needed an induction. Jenni was concerned about a pulmonary embolism as she saw it in the media as a common cause of death or challenges during childbirth. She discussed a plan of care if she developed clots before consenting to her subsequent surgical birth.

Jenni and Bryson chose a surgical birth after a prolonged, four-day induction. The surgery was a shift from her vision but ended up being the most positive and relieving part of her labor and birth story. Jenni felt good after her birth in terms of pain management. Once her body calmed down when they were at home, she could feel the sleep deprivation in conjunction with breastfeeding challenges. Their daughter had screaming fits that led them to call the nurse for support; that night, their nurse explored the idea of one night of baby formula. Jenni gave herself permission to rest by using supplemental formula for the night. Bryson ventured out in the middle of the night to purchase a can. However, when he returned to the house, all was well, and their baby girl had nursed. The reassurance of having a backup plan to feed their baby gave them some relief and peace. Their breastfeeding journey has been enjoyable for Jenni and their baby girl.

Hospital Birth, Postpartum, Cesarean BirthLaurel GourrierJanuary 25, 2023Surgical Birth, Informed Consent, Postpartum SupportComment

163 | Strength in Vulnerability - Shay Australia

Black & Queer Mama, Shay Australia and her Filipino partner, Paul, took a deep dive into preconception into what pregnancy would look like for him and her clear expectations of his engagement. He was locked in and in agreement with how he wanted to show up. They both made changes during the pregnancy to improve their health, which included smoking cessation and abstaining from alcohol. They made a commitment to be involved with doula and midwifery care. After trying to conceive for a few months without success, they took a break from trying and they found out they were expecting soon after. During their break, Shay attended a doula training and gained a wealth of knowledge that she immediately found helpful.

Deep-growing fears about bringing their baby earthside started to cause anxiety for her. Knowing her baby was safe within her body was assuring. However, the time would come when she would have to manage parenthood in the outside world. They started to develop a birth plan and decide who to invite to their sacred space. Her midwife helped her set the tone and environment that would welcome their child. They started curating a list of people that best fit the space they wanted to create. This exercise made way for uncomfortable conversations with people they loved. Managing conversations about gender identity was critical in creating the family dynamics and open communication they desired. These conversations and challenges with relationships through the pregnancy drastically changed her initial ideas about birth presence. Isolation set in, causing emotional stress but allowed her to center herself and Paul as they stepped into this new chapter together.

Paul and Shay’s labor and delivery experience started after a week of prodromal labor. They were deep in labor land at home until they decided when they could go to the birthing center. The midwife met them at their home to support and monitor her progress. Shortly after their time together, they were ready to transition to the birthing space. Contractions were building as the intensity grew. Shay felt fully supported to trust her body and baby to birth. She reached the point of no return as the baby slipped out quickly. They bonded immediately as their lactation journey began with the newborn crawl.

Shay stands by setting boundaries in life, especially during pregnancy for expectant families. She has created a series of books about motherhood and a birth story journal that helps birthing people process their pregnancy and labor in real-time and as postpartum support.

Birth Center, PostpartumLaurel GourrierJanuary 19, 2023Comment

162 | Built to Birth - Priya & Harsh Gandhi

With the culmination of a marriage biodata form, a year of cyberstalking, and the power of liquid courage Priya and Harsh finally connected. After a short courtship, they would marry during the Covid-19 pandemic. The couple found out they were expecting their first child while still managing the pandemic and the challenges it would bring to their parenthood journey. They were committed to learning how to prepare for birth.

Due to the nature of the pandemic and limited access to additional hospital guests, Harsh took on the task of learning doula skills. He studied physiological birth and ways to manage the birthing space, which included the BRAIN acronym (Benefits, Risks, Alternatives, Instinct or Intuition, and Nothing). These skills were instrumental in making decisions for Priya and baby as shifts arose.

On the day labor started, they tested their new skills and managed laboring at home until they suspected a ruptured membrane (her water broke). Because they were unsure of the leak, they contacted the hospital and planned to make their way in to check and bring their bags in case they needed to stay. They were informed that it was hospital policy to keep patients whose membranes had ruptured regardless of their stage of labor. Priya and Harsh kept busy by having a dance party and keeping Priya active as much as possible to help the baby engage and progress. Harsh was attentive and helped Priya build her oxytocin levels. She recounted the magical feelings she had with him being there. Their partnership was in full bloom in the birthing space.

After 3-4 hours of pushing and intense back pain, Priya’s provider recommended a surgical birth. Harsh and Priya agreed that after discussing their case and acknowledging all of the hard work she had put in, to make an empowered decision to have a surgical birth. Harsh praised the caregiver team as the surgery was efficient and smooth. They met their son and gently bonded with him as Priya continued to receive care.

Postpartum, COVID-19, Hospital BirthLaurel GourrierJanuary 12, 2023Comment

161 | NICU Grad to Advocate - Mya Morenzoni

After a high blood pressure read at 20 weeks gestation, Mya started care with Maternal Fetal Medicine out of an abundance of caution. Seven weeks later, she would report to the hospital with a headache, feeling sick, and an even higher blood pressure reading, ultimately diagnosed with preeclampsia. Mya, a registered nurse, immediately knew her birth would be different than expected. Her doula met her at the hospital, as she was still being monitored and trying to keep the baby in utero as long as possible. Mya faced many decisions regarding her care about how she wanted to deliver her daughter; vaginal induced birth or surgical birth. She decided on a surgical birth. Mya wanted her husband to be engaged in the process by being able to cut the cord. During delivery, she was still managing her blood pressure through medications, magnesium sulfate, and Labetalol. The magnesium sulfate was hard on her body as it caused nausea, and she wasn't allowed to eat during administration. Balancing different rooms to stabilize her blood pressure and monitoring; went on for eight days until her daughter was born. Mya noted that administering medication for a patient versus being the patient was a very different experience. She had to step out of her "nurse mind" to be able to advocate for herself.

As baby Aria's umbilical cord showed signs of inadequate blood flow; Mya initiated the request for her cesarean birth. She would enter the world healthy, screaming with her eyes wide open. She weighed a little over a pound and was rushed to the NICU with her father. Mya stayed at the hospital for three additional days. She was ready to go home for rest and nourishment, but it was gut-wrenching to have to leave her daughter at the hospital. Thankfully, she had started pumping and was able to deliver several tubes of colostrum to the NICU before leaving.

Mya's birth experience has allowed her to become more vulnerable. She confided in her husband and parents that she was not okay and leaned into them for support. She shared the term NICU PTSD and the effects it can have on new parents. Mya had to face the reality that her child might not come home. Therapy was her saving grace to cope with anxiety and concerns about Aria.

From her own experience, Mya is creating a virtual safe space for moms to connect. Advising new parents as a trained doula Mya has developed a list of tips for expectant families. Start with researching providers, hire a doula to support you and prepare you for birth, learn about the NICU facility in the hospital, and hire a lactation consultant that makes you feel comfortable. You can connect with more of Mya's journey and support offerings here.

Hospital Birth, NICU, PostpartumLaurel GourrierDecember 22, 2022Comment

159 | Redemptive Reflection - Elizabeth Rocha

High school sweethearts Elizabeth and Luis started to build their family shortly after marriage. There was no family history of infertility, but after many conversations within their circle, they felt it was worth starting a family as soon as possible. After learning more about ovulation tracking, they were expecting their first child without any challenges.

Fear of birth was built up by not knowing enough about the process - education helped release this fear. They took childbirth education and prenatal yoga together, which also helped them bond in the experience.

When they arrived at the hospital for labor, Elizabeth started to feel the cascade of interventions taking away her voice. She felt disconnected from her body after receiving an epidural. The pushing stage was long, three hours long. The feelings of joy she expected when her daughter arrived earthside were replaced with relief. It was over. Their nursing journey started as painful as the baby had a lip tie. Elizabeth didn’t feel equipped with proper knowledge of breastfeeding and pumping. Their discharge felt overwhelming, and they would go home with a crying baby with minimal support. They hired three different lactation counselors and endured two lip tie procedures. Elizabeth was determined to have a nursing relationship with her daughter, and she did.

Elizabeth wanted something different for their second birth as she recalled her first pregnancy. This time she was diagnosed with gestational diabetes, which pushed her to make some health and nutrition changes as she worked through the initial shame she felt from the diagnosis. Sharing her diagnosis with friends and other birthing people helped her work through the emotions as others shared that they had endured the same. They hired a doula to provide additional support for managing the pregnancy and labor.

Labor was spontaneous, and she managed the contractions at home in a way that felt good and empowering. She isolated herself as labor progressed. Luis was more engaged during labor as he found his role this time. They would arrive at the hospital already 9.5 cm dilated with a cervical lip. She had created an environment to stay connected to her body with music and utilizing an eye mask during contractions. Elizabeth maintained her voice throughout her hospital experience. She asked questions and spoke up when she needed help. They welcomed their second daughter less than an hour after arriving at the hospital feeling joyful and empowered.

Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierDecember 8, 2022Latinx Parenting, Birth Preparation, Doula Support, Gestational Diabetes, Postpartum Support, Breastfeeding/ChestfeedingComment

158 | A Journey of Intentionality - Janelle & Mivon Green

Janelle & Mivon perfectly timed their conception to align with their wedding day. They were able to share their pregnancy with their wedding guests as a sweet surprise.

The early stages of pregnancy were plagued with exhaustion and food aversions. Her midwife reminded her that the work of growing a baby was intense. This allowed Janelle to give herself grace for what she had considered “laziness.” Aligning their spirituality with their birth and parenting goals with the support of a spiritual doula helped them feel ready and calm.

After preparing for months through education, optimizing their physical health, and mental preparation, labor started one night, as it often does. A quiet moment of solitude brought Janelle gently into labor land as she practiced her breathing and tracked her contractions in the darkness. Eventually, they made it to the birthing center to determine progress and the next steps. Mivon, Janelle, and her mom started to create a peaceful environment and managed consistent contractions, and progressed through early labor. Time passed, and Janelle fell back into solitude when space allowed. During a heart rate check, the midwife captured a heart deceleration, and the baby's heart recovered quickly. More time passed, but her dilation had not changed, accompanied by another heart deceleration. The difficult conversation about the possibility of a hospital transfer was necessary. The midwife felt confident that the baby was ok and encouraged movement. Mivon and Janelle’s mother started to feel uncertain about their plans to stay at the birthing center. Janelle felt the shifts in the room. She trusted her intuition and stuck to the plan, and trusted in the midwife and Janelle. Prayer and shifting through position changes led to active labor and no more decelerations. Mivon’s hands would be the first to touch Baby Zara as Janelle pushed her out. Skin-to-skin started immediately with Janelle as they welcomed their child and the flood of emotions that would ensue.

Baby Zara would come earthside on her late uncle’s birthday, making her entry a blessing and a tribute. The term labor is fitting as the work for her to get here was intentional and intense.

Birth Center, PostpartumLaurel GourrierDecember 1, 2022Midwifery Care, Birth Preparation, Spiritual DoulaComment

157 | A Redemptive Birth - Celia Bouza & Whitley Mingo

Celia Kelly Bouza and her husband, Terrell, welcomed two children in the last three years, while managing their busy careers at ESPN. Leading up to their son Axel’s pregnancy, they were met with a PCOS diagnosis for Celia and a miscarriage. The provider was supportive and helped them manage fertility support, and their journey was off to a great start.

However, upon arriving at the hospital, the nurses didn’t provide the support she had expected. There was a series of heart decelerations and position changes that led to an emergency surgical birth (belly birth) Things happened so quickly that the staff forgot to bring her husband along. He made it just in time as the surgery commenced.

After fertility challenges conceiving the first child, Celia and Terrell had no problems when they decided to expand their family again. Celia decided to hire a doula for additional support for her second pregnancy. She had experienced a dismissive provider about her extreme nausea early on, prompting her to change the medical team. Celia found her doula Whitley after a quick Instagram search. Whitley was forthcoming about her inexperience with VBAC as she met with Celia and offered her referrals to additional doulas. However, Celia felt they were the perfect fit due to her humility and their instant connection. This pregnancy through a few curve balls as they managed placenta previa, a slight increase in protein in the urine, and a couple of high blood pressure reads. The placenta previa would resolve itself but the other two issues led to an induction that triggered PTSD from her first birth experience.

Celia, Terrell, and Whitley arrived at the hospital for the induction. They were armed with deep knowledge of her medical records from Axel’s birth, empowered to make informed decisions, and a strong desire to have a redemptive birth.

After a rocky start, Whitley helped create an environment to help Celia relax and rest. That space of peace would be interrupted as her dilation and progress didn't match her expectations as the induction went on. The spiral started, and Celia’s mood shifted; her doula helped her recenter and reclaim her power in that moment of deep discouragement. They made some decisions about pausing the Pitocin and starting an epidural. The epidural placement did not go as expected. The anesthesiologist denied her reality when she told him it wasn’t working. She effectively banned him from her care team. The epidural was fixed, and she started to feel relief. Celia got her redemption by way of VBAC; despite the baby having a “true knot” and meconium present in the amniotic fluid, there were no complications. Celia was also able to find a space in healing about the loss of her mother in the same hospital she had just given birth in. A true story of redemption that has allowed her to feel a sense of wholeness.

Cesarean Birth, Hospital Birth, Postpartum, VBACLaurel GourrierNovember 17, 2022Surgical Birth, VBAC, PCOS, Nuchal Cord, True Knot, Black Doulas, Black OBGYNComment

155 | An Unexpected Arrival - Kelly Barnes

Yoga Instructor and traveling Occupational Therapist, Kelly Barnes shared her quicker than expected homebirth at 37 weeks. An experience she describes as "challenging, overwhelming, and rewarding all at the same time." Her expectations regarding when and how she would give birth were dismantled but the result was pure magic.

Kelly maintained an active lifestyle which included yoga and running throughout her pregnancy. Dual care with a certified homebirth midwife and OB. Envisioning a water birth was a focal point for Kelly as she embarked on her pregnancy. As a contingency, she enlisted dual care with a licensed professional midwife for the homebirth and an obstetrician to cover in case she needed to transfer from home.

Building up to her maternity leave, she loaded up on work to fully fund her maternity leave. As the nesting phase started to kick in she started to show signs of early labor. This sudden change caught Kelly off guard, and she wasn’t mentally or physically prepared for the baby to arrive. Her husband enlisted her sister to help her reconnect in mind and body to settle into the reality that she didn’t have weeks to prepare. Labor progressed as her husband scrambled to complete the homebirth checklist, thankfully, their doula was present to support her. The atmosphere shifted as her team slowly made their way to the home and set up the environment. Kelly managed labor with what was familiar to her, movement. She would live out her vision as she pushed her baby out.

Birth and motherhood are teaching Kelly that research is key, aligning with your care provider, and making informed choices.

Home Birth, Postpartum, WaterbirthLaurel GourrierNovember 3, 2022Home Birth Family, Precipitous Birth, Doula Support, Midwifery Care, Preterm Babies, Preterm BirthComment

150 | Celebration of Life - Shawnise Chantell

This is a story about loss and rebirth; specifically what the Medical Industrial Complex deems a “near miss.” A maternal near miss occurs when someone nearly died but survived a complication that occurred during pregnancy, childbirth, or within 42 days of termination of pregnancy.

Consider where your mind, body, and spirit are sitting during the time you read and listen to this story.

Shawnise embarked on her third pregnancy with intentional care for herself and growing her family one last time. She managed her health and nutrition while raising her other daughters without complications in her pregnancy. A mother's quiet preparation had carried her through to term.

She planned a tubal ligation after the birth upon deciding that her family was complete. Shawnise understood that the procedure was simple and harmless, that would not be the case for Shawnise. Soon after delivering her daughter, she was rushed into the operating room for her procedure, not allowing time for skin-to-skin or initiating lactation. Post-surgery, she showed signs of severe illness over the next few days. The family immediately advocated for her care and informed her care providers that something was wrong and that she may be showing signs of infection. The response was not immediate and was dismissive at first. Her family pushed harder for emergent care; exploratory surgery began that night. Shawnise would spend two months in the hospital after being diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure, Renal Failure, Perforated Bowel, Double Pneumonia, and Upper Respiratory Failure. Shawnise’s thoughts started to echo that she would not survive. Shawnise flatlined on the day before her expected discharge from the hospital. Her sister returned to the hospital and showed up in her scrubs from her job. She was mistaken for a staff member as they interacted with her in the room. Only discovering later that she was Shawnise’s sister after she passed out seeing her lifeless sister on the bed. Twenty minutes passed as Shawnise experienced a spiritual awakening in what she calls the Afterlife. She describes feeling the love and grace of God before being sent back home.

Trauma has a way of stealing joy from beautiful moments in our lives. You would never know that Baby Kensie’s birth was peaceful. It was perfectly normal. The pregnancy was beautiful. The family was strong then and even stronger today. Addressing her mental health has brought her to the point of sharing her story of triumph. Shawnise wakes up every day and can care for her children. Love helps her move forward and not look back.

Hospital Birth, Loss, PostpartumLaurel GourrierSeptember 22, 2022Tubal Ligation, Birth Advocacy, Postpartum SupportComment

149 | Love is in the Details ~ Oona-Ife & Anthony Olaiya Wright

Oona-Ife and Anthony were hosting friends at their home when they decided she should take a pregnancy test. She took the test because she had spent the night throwing up after a night of eating steak and butter pecan ice cream. They learned they were expecting a baby, and the news brought so much joy that they had to stifle their excitement from their guests. Anthony even snuck out of the house to shed a few tears as their lives were about to change in this season of expansion.

Despite a rocky start, Oona felt an abundance of self-love and support from her village, which left her with positive reflections regarding her pregnancy. Anthony made space during their journey to learn about what to expect during childbirth and was able to connect with other new and expectant fathers for support. He was intentional about his presence for prenatal visits and building relationships with their care providers.

Labor would gradually commence after a violent bout of nausea and vomiting one evening. Oona-Ife and Anthony would fumble around trying out some tried and true labor strategies that would end in a good laugh and an A for effort. Because they were having a homebirth they were in close contact with their doula and midwifery team about changes in contraction patterns, behaviors, and any concerns they had. As things picked up, their doula would arrive first to assess the scene and encourage them to call the midwife to the house. Laboring and birthing at home proved to be their best decision as it fostered comfort and ease that kept them calm. Despite some hiccups with their tub and a moment of familiar panic for those who needed to relocate during the transition, Oona-Ife would deliver their daughter safely in the water.

The midwives and doula would leave them to bond and care for their new baby and themselves. They would receive a caravan of support with family members arriving at different intervals to visit and provide care over the first month postpartum. Just as they started to get a rhythm at about eight days postpartum Oona-Ife would have severe headaches; she grew concerned regarding her own health. She would eventually go to the hospital for care after connecting with her midwife as her blood pressure elevated to dangerous levels. She would be diagnosed with Postpartum Preeclampsia and Covid-19. Thankfully, she centered her care and was able to heal with continued support from her family and providers.

Home Birth, Postpartum, Waterbirth, COVID-19Laurel GourrierSeptember 15, 2022Home Birth Family, Birth Preparation, Partner Support, Midwifery Care, Doula Support, Postpartum Preeclampsia, Birthing During COVIDComment

148 | A Midwife’s Unplanned Homebirth - Gianna Fay

Gianna and Evan have welcomed three children into the world. The words joy, blessing, and purpose have marked each pregnancy and birth. They learned that they would be having a girl after the birth of two sons. Their daughter's birth would make her the first girl born on Evan's side of the family in over 100 years.

At 38 weeks and six days, Gianna would go into labor while preparing for the Super Bowl party they were hosting. She managed her surges and dismissed them as Braxton Hicks contractions increasing because she had been busy that day. After putting the kids to bed, she realized that she could be in active labor. In her solitude, she drifted into "laborland." Evan joined her and started timing her surges, they began to get ready to leave, and her water broke. The surges intensified as they waited for her cousin to arrive to be with the children. A few strong surges would pass, and they would notice meconium in the leaking fluid. Her midwife brain would click and shift her focus and alarm Evan.

The pressure would set in, and she had to determine if they would stay home or go. Baby Chloe decided for them and arrived with additional support for Evan from the 911 dispatcher. They knew they would still want to go to the hospital, as it was the original plan. The baby was fine and vocal as they awaited their transport to the hospital. The EMTs arrived and helped them get situated for the ride; the energy shifted as they thought they were coming to intervene in complicated home birth. She informed them that she was a midwife. Once they arrived at the hospital, Gianna would be in midwife mode and ready to be checked over and welcomed into L&D. Everyone was doing well except for a tear that would help her come back to her body and feel pain.

Postpartum planning happened prenatally, and that was helpful for the whole family. Evan and Gianna worked through a plan and garnered the support they needed. They were intentional about getting what they needed most, including paying for a Mom's helper, nutritional meals from a meal planning company, and in-home support from the women in their family. Communication every few weeks as they determined what they needed at each stage was a key to maintaining their sanity with three young children. Although they had a great birth and supportive care, postpartum anxiety became evident through symptoms like irritability. She connected with her therapist and is still navigating those waters with grace.

Home Birth, Postpartum, UnassistedLaurel GourrierJune 2, 2022Unplanned Homebirth, Husband Doula, Postpartum Planning, Postpartum Mental HealthComment

147 | On their Terms - MyLin & Lindsay Stokes Kennedy

MyLin and Lindsay started their lives together after marriage with the hopes of expansion. When they decided to have more children, they were not fully aware of the obstacles they would encounter. The sticker shock regarding Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) expense steered them towards traditional or old-school insemination with a known donor. Patience over almost two years and a devastating anembryonic pregnancy would lead them to the full-term pregnancy and consequent birth of their first child together.

Lindsay chose to carry the baby, and they managed their insemination personally with advice from a fertility specialist. The fertility specialist validated their concerns and guided them through the most straightforward ways to help them. Despite having PCOS, she could make adjustments in their fertility journey and conceive. Her pregnancy was amazing, and there were no issues until the end of the pregnancy. She presented with itchy hands and feet, which was one indicator of Cholestasis. Cholestasis can affect the liver and can be dangerous for mom and baby. An induction was ordered at 37 weeks to avoid complications to their health and after two days of labor, Lennox would join the family. Shortly afterward, Lindsay developed preeclampsia and would need additional monitoring.

Postpartum for Lindsay included healing and challenges with breastfeeding. Thankfully, MyLin had started the induced lactating process prenatally with the hopes of sharing the work of feeding the baby. She was able to nourish the baby while Lindsay worked through latching issues with Baby Lennox.

MyLin’s pregnancy required more preparation as she wanted to deliver at home. They were able to have all of the birth-related services to make her dream homebirth come true with the generous support of the Victoria Project, a nonprofit organization serving Southern California. The Victoria Project provided full financial support for a midwife (not the deposit), chiropractor, pelvic floor therapy, hypnobirthing, and childbirth education.

MyLin labored with her family and doula as they awaited the intensity of active labor. Lindsay busied herself preparing the tub for her but found her work was futile. MyLin found herself in “labor land” and talked her baby out as he quickly slipped out. The midwife would arrive later and attend to the newly expanded family. She had four postpartum midwifery visits and was able to spend a lot of time in bed, healing physically and mentally.

Finding the right avenues to expand their family was pivotal in their birthing experiences. MyLin and Lindsay share their knowledge with other same-sex couples to make themselves an accessible resource. Patience, grace, and softness are essential aspects of their continued parenting journey.

Hospital Birth, Postpartum, Home Birth, IUI/IVFLaurel GourrierMay 19, 2022IUI, Anembryonic Pregnancy, PCOS, Cholestasis, Home Birth Family, Postpartum PreeclampsiaComment

146 | Outward Growth from Within - Michah Thomas

Michah met pregnancy with sickness in the form of a heavy dose of Hyperemesis Gravidarum, also known as HG. It is a condition that presents in pregnancy as severe and persistent nausea and vomiting caused by hormone fluctuations. HG caused Michah to experience weight loss, food aversions, and anxiety about her baby's growth. She found comfort in the power of watermelon and OTC nutrition shakes.

Despite her challenges, she moved forward with planning a homebirth with her partner. The midwife they chose was informative and supportive, helping ease any concerns. Everything was going as planned until the baby started measuring smaller than expected. She started having routine growth scans until her provider discovered an amniotic fluid leak.

An amnioinfusion can treat an amniotic fluid leak. Unfortunately, this was not the case for Michah. She reported to her local hospital, where she would receive excellent care during her induction and subsequent labor. Michah delivered her baby with the help of forceps due to heart decelerations at the pushing stage to avoid a surgical birth. Her baby was sunnyside up, challenging her descent into the birth canal.

Physical recovery from the forceps assisted birth added to her healing process, but she was supported by her partner. Michah has connected with herself on different levels as postpartum has taught her grace and patience. Her work has been affected as it has become the focus of her Master's degree program. Building supportive relationships and honoring boundaries to grow as human beings and build healthy, strong families, they manage life on the other side of birth. Stepping in to support each other without local family support has been challenging, but again grace is sufficient, and Michah is slowly coming back to herself.

Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierMay 12, 2022Hyperemesis, Induction, Amniotic Fluid Leak, Forceps DeliveryComment

145 | Fear & Triumph - Ashlee Grant

Fear and triumph are two words that Ashlee Grant uses to describe her collective birthing experiences. She would navigate the uneasiness of a first pregnancy after miscarriage culminating in a surgical birth of her and her husband's choosing, solidifying their bond as partners. She found the still, small voice that strengthened their resolve.

Ashlee entered the second pregnancy as a new version of herself. She had found her voice after coming to grips with previous trauma and made space to process the layers of her first birth. A deepened knowledge of her body and spirit's needs deepened as her second son grew. She would again seek the support of her sister-in-law as her doula; this time, they had both grown and prepared to bring Ashlee's vision to life. Her doula was now working with ROOTT and had added more perinatal education to her skillset. Complications with the pandemic's beginning presented uncertainty as Ashlee and her husband, Jerod, considered how they would manage if their doula were not present. Thankfully labor would ensue before the hospital's temporary ban on doulas would start.

Ashlee labored at home with her family and doula as planned. The atmosphere was peaceful and undisturbed. They would leave for the hospital when the contractions (surges) were three minutes apart. She arrived in triage and consented to a cervical check that revealed she was 4cm dilated. Instantly defeated and whisked back to the same progression of her first labor Ashlee could feel a shift in her demeanor. Her doula quickly reminded her that it wasn't the same, her body was doing the work, and she would birth the way she wanted to this time. The redirection allowed her to connect to the present and continue balancing movement and rest in the labor room. She had the birth she wanted, delivering a healthy second son, this time without the epidural and minimal interventions.

Today, Ashlee encourages women to find their voices, seek support, and be their own best advocates. She is the host of her own self-coined "preachcast," Planted, where she speaks to the heart of women and opens their eyes to their unique gifting.

COVID-19, Hospital Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierMay 5, 2022ROOTT Doulas, COVID-19, Black Families MatterComment

144 | Letting Go of Expectations - Danielle Henderson & Shandell Rosa

Visualization is a powerful tool, especially for preparing for labor; it can turn our hopes into expectations. Much was the case for Danielle Henderson as she and her husband, Jeff, began preparing for a home birth for their first child.

Danielle created the environment she had envisioned by having calming music and lighting during her labor. The midwife arrived and was deeply committed to being present and supporting Danielle. She even had the support of her mother and sister as planned. Delivery drew out longer than they thought, and there was a family history of short or precipitous labors. However, a tilted uterus would make her work feel more intense and give the feeling that she had progressed. Her mother and sister would eventually leave as time went on. During labor, Danielle found herself coming out of her calmness and felt that hindered her progression. The next day Shandell returned to the porch awaiting the baby’s arrival. Little did she know that she would be entering the birth space. Jeff would ask her to come into the home and support the team. Shandell recalls knowing how vulnerable her sister would feel, and she cautiously stepped in and avoided looking at her to help her maintain her mindset and not face her disappointment. In a word, she held a boundary for her sister while also holding space. Despite having a nuchal arm and double wrapped umbilical cord impeding his descent, Baby Jackson would make a healthy entrance earthside in his parents’ bed.

After her birth, Danielle could feel herself detaching from the experience as she would continue to live where she had delivered her baby. Connecting memories with spaces were hard on her mentally. The newness of motherhood was an adjustment, with full support from her family, and her husband has helped with the adjustment of new motherhood.

COVID-19, Home Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierApril 28, 2022Hypnobirth, Home Birth Family, Village Support, Partner Support, Long LaborComment

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