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174 | Trusting Our Power - Raquel & Chris Williams

The year 2020 will forever be etched in the minds of those who lived to tell the tale. Oh, the stories we will tell. The smoke and mirrors were dispersed and the United States revealed its true self. We bore witness to Riot, after Riot, after Riot. The revolution appeared to be televised after all. But deep in our communities the true revolution was brewing. Many Black women and birthing people continued to give birth despite the headlines, the statistics, and the odds stacked against them. But they didn’t just give birth; they gave birth how they wanted, where they wanted, and focused on what was most important to them.

The Williams chose to keep their pregnancy to themselves aside from their parents. Their birth plans were kept under wraps and allowed them to keep out the noise, opinions, and outside stressors. Chris and Raquel chose a homebirth with a midwife and a doula.

Holistic care equipped Raquel with education, mental fortitude, and an understanding of what childbirth could include. When she started to feel the small ripples of early labor she contacted her birth team which included her midwife, doula, and birth photographer. Chris was spending the day attending graduation ceremonies for his students. Raquel told Chris he was fine to go and she knew it would be fine. They had a late dinner but didn’t set up the birthing tub because it was too late in the day. The waves were not close enough for her to think that she was in active labor. She checked in with her midwife and she told her to use her discernment. Raquel took a Tylenol PM and they enjoyed a movie and facials until she fell asleep. Around four in the morning, Raquel stated that she had to poop. They went down together, Chris could see her from the door, and as Raquel made a maneuver he said, “I don’t think that’s poop.” Chris was scared that the baby had died, due to the shape and stillness of her head. Meanwhile, Raquel was in a calm, zen state as she assured Chris the baby was ok. They were able to Facetime their midwife to manage the delivery of the baby. Chris caught their baby with a nuchal cord and unwrapped it and placed the baby on Raquel’s chest. The midwife entered the house shortly after. Dani and the birth photographer joined them shortly afterward for postpartum support and photography.

Immediately postpartum, they walked back down the hall with their baby. The experience of having their team come to them and the care that was provided for them had them in awe. Raquel believes that everything we need to have children… we already have it. We’ve been having babies like this forever.

172 | Trusting Intuition, Rooted in Autonomy - Emoni Cobb

Home Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierJanuary 10, 2024ROOTT Doulas, Home Birth Family, Black Doulas, Postpartum Support, Postpartum DoulaComment

170 | Building it Better - Esther McCant

Esther McCant, founder and CEO of Metro Mommy Agency, opened up about her five pregnancies, which included a miscarriage that would push her to self-advocate with her medical provider.

Esther’s first pregnancy happened within the first few months of her marriage. Six weeks later, she learned that she had a blighted ovum and her provider prepared her to miscarry. She had the choice to let the ovum pass or go to the hospital for a DNC. She stayed home as long as she could but eventually went to the hospital. Esther recalled the doctor taking quite a while to see her, and when she did she insisted that Esther still needed a DNC even though everything had passed. She felt threatened by the doctor about the potential that she could bleed out. This interaction helped Esther to trust herself. She chose to leave and go home. The grieving process started; she became pregnant again within a few months. The hospital miscarriage experience led her to want to explore other birthing options. Her sister-in-law invited her to her calming water birth; which helped her see a new vision. Esther found a midwife who resonated with her and a doula who could support her choices. The midwife was able to support her in a birthing center. Baby would arrive with a nuchal hand and in the OP position by squatting.

The third pregnancy brought on changes that would impact her nutrition, wellness, and the birthing environment she desired; which included a water birth. Feminine energy filled the birthing space by inviting her sisters-in-law. Her son’s birth was challenging as she had back labor. She regrets not getting chiropractic care and having a doula this time. Postpartum was filled with engaging with other women as opposed to the more isolating experience she had after her first birth. They had moved from Florida to Alabama, and the difference in provider options was vastly different.

When Esther thought she was in labor they made the two-and-a-half-hour trek to Chattanooga to no avail as the baby was not ready. They turned the trip into a babymoon and would make the trip again a couple of days later. Esther and her husband brought the kids along to meet up with her family who would care for them. They didn’t make it there on time due to a flat tire problem. Esther gave birth within 6 hours of leaving their home and although she felt distracted by having the other children there and wondering where her family was. Esther’s Haitian roots welcomed the Haitian bath, teas, and essential oils, and started the restoration process with her mother coming to support her.

When Esther had her fourth son, she was a trained birth doula. She envisioned a waterbirth with her partner, two midwives, and two doulas present. The birth and pregnancy were heavy in dealing with the ongoing race issues in our country and the experiences of Black men and boys. Giving herself space to release those feelings during long labor allowed her to relax in her body and give birth smoothly. Her vision would come true as she delivered her son in a haze of joy.

Birth Center, Community Highlights, Home Birth, Postpartum, WaterbirthLaurel GourrierOctober 16, 2023Doula of Color, Midwifery CareComment

156 | Peace & Power - Deborah Woodson

Intentional family planning set up Deborah Woodson and her husband, Mike, for an empowering journey. Watching documentaries and reading articles about birth and, specifically, Black birth experiences helped bring the two of them in step with home birth planning.

Early morning bathroom trips hinted that early labor would start soon. However, after some nausea and a walk, the body shifts calmed down. Deborah’s mom was there and shared that she believed labor would start that day as she managed her stomach pains. Her mom was right, Deborah would lose her mucus plug that night, and intense contractions began. Her midwife advised that she rest and to contact her when things picked up. Deborah fell into labor land and frequently retreated within herself. Their baby girl arrived before the midwife. However, her husband, mother, and sister were present in the home. Shock kept her frozen as she waited for her midwife’s care. Mike held their daughter, sobbing with joy.

Deborah’s key takeaway from her first birth was learning that she could rely on her body. She became more aware of the intricacies of her body and how it changed. She felt good physically in the immediate postpartum period.

Less than two years after their daughter's birth, their family expanded again. Deborah struggled with the concept of expansive love for multiple children. The pregnancy was uneventful and without physical challenges. Deborah's hyperawareness about her body helped her know that her baby had shifted to a breech position. Her midwife helped her flip the baby through skillful maneuvering. Labor was a lot more painful as they discovered during the pushing phase he was malpositioned in LOT (Left Occiput Transverse). Once he was delivered, her baby was calm; the family bonded comfortably in their home.

Her second birth has helped her release the need to control and embrace flexibility. Parenting two young children comes with the need for patience and understanding of their individual needs.

Home Birth, Unassisted, WaterbirthLaurel GourrierNovember 11, 2022Unassisted, Home Birth Family, Precipitous Birth, Black Midwives, Grand MidwifeComment

155 | An Unexpected Arrival - Kelly Barnes

Yoga Instructor and traveling Occupational Therapist, Kelly Barnes shared her quicker than expected homebirth at 37 weeks. An experience she describes as "challenging, overwhelming, and rewarding all at the same time." Her expectations regarding when and how she would give birth were dismantled but the result was pure magic.

Kelly maintained an active lifestyle which included yoga and running throughout her pregnancy. Dual care with a certified homebirth midwife and OB. Envisioning a water birth was a focal point for Kelly as she embarked on her pregnancy. As a contingency, she enlisted dual care with a licensed professional midwife for the homebirth and an obstetrician to cover in case she needed to transfer from home.

Building up to her maternity leave, she loaded up on work to fully fund her maternity leave. As the nesting phase started to kick in she started to show signs of early labor. This sudden change caught Kelly off guard, and she wasn’t mentally or physically prepared for the baby to arrive. Her husband enlisted her sister to help her reconnect in mind and body to settle into the reality that she didn’t have weeks to prepare. Labor progressed as her husband scrambled to complete the homebirth checklist, thankfully, their doula was present to support her. The atmosphere shifted as her team slowly made their way to the home and set up the environment. Kelly managed labor with what was familiar to her, movement. She would live out her vision as she pushed her baby out.

Birth and motherhood are teaching Kelly that research is key, aligning with your care provider, and making informed choices.

149 | Love is in the Details ~ Oona-Ife & Anthony Olaiya Wright

Oona-Ife and Anthony were hosting friends at their home when they decided she should take a pregnancy test. She took the test because she had spent the night throwing up after a night of eating steak and butter pecan ice cream. They learned they were expecting a baby, and the news brought so much joy that they had to stifle their excitement from their guests. Anthony even snuck out of the house to shed a few tears as their lives were about to change in this season of expansion.

Despite a rocky start, Oona felt an abundance of self-love and support from her village, which left her with positive reflections regarding her pregnancy. Anthony made space during their journey to learn about what to expect during childbirth and was able to connect with other new and expectant fathers for support. He was intentional about his presence for prenatal visits and building relationships with their care providers.

Labor would gradually commence after a violent bout of nausea and vomiting one evening. Oona-Ife and Anthony would fumble around trying out some tried and true labor strategies that would end in a good laugh and an A for effort. Because they were having a homebirth they were in close contact with their doula and midwifery team about changes in contraction patterns, behaviors, and any concerns they had. As things picked up, their doula would arrive first to assess the scene and encourage them to call the midwife to the house. Laboring and birthing at home proved to be their best decision as it fostered comfort and ease that kept them calm. Despite some hiccups with their tub and a moment of familiar panic for those who needed to relocate during the transition, Oona-Ife would deliver their daughter safely in the water.

The midwives and doula would leave them to bond and care for their new baby and themselves. They would receive a caravan of support with family members arriving at different intervals to visit and provide care over the first month postpartum. Just as they started to get a rhythm at about eight days postpartum Oona-Ife would have severe headaches; she grew concerned regarding her own health. She would eventually go to the hospital for care after connecting with her midwife as her blood pressure elevated to dangerous levels. She would be diagnosed with Postpartum Preeclampsia and Covid-19. Thankfully, she centered her care and was able to heal with continued support from her family and providers.

148 | A Midwife’s Unplanned Homebirth - Gianna Fay

Gianna and Evan have welcomed three children into the world. The words joy, blessing, and purpose have marked each pregnancy and birth. They learned that they would be having a girl after the birth of two sons. Their daughter's birth would make her the first girl born on Evan's side of the family in over 100 years.

At 38 weeks and six days, Gianna would go into labor while preparing for the Super Bowl party they were hosting. She managed her surges and dismissed them as Braxton Hicks contractions increasing because she had been busy that day. After putting the kids to bed, she realized that she could be in active labor. In her solitude, she drifted into "laborland." Evan joined her and started timing her surges, they began to get ready to leave, and her water broke. The surges intensified as they waited for her cousin to arrive to be with the children. A few strong surges would pass, and they would notice meconium in the leaking fluid. Her midwife brain would click and shift her focus and alarm Evan.

The pressure would set in, and she had to determine if they would stay home or go. Baby Chloe decided for them and arrived with additional support for Evan from the 911 dispatcher. They knew they would still want to go to the hospital, as it was the original plan. The baby was fine and vocal as they awaited their transport to the hospital. The EMTs arrived and helped them get situated for the ride; the energy shifted as they thought they were coming to intervene in complicated home birth. She informed them that she was a midwife. Once they arrived at the hospital, Gianna would be in midwife mode and ready to be checked over and welcomed into L&D. Everyone was doing well except for a tear that would help her come back to her body and feel pain.

Postpartum planning happened prenatally, and that was helpful for the whole family. Evan and Gianna worked through a plan and garnered the support they needed. They were intentional about getting what they needed most, including paying for a Mom's helper, nutritional meals from a meal planning company, and in-home support from the women in their family. Communication every few weeks as they determined what they needed at each stage was a key to maintaining their sanity with three young children. Although they had a great birth and supportive care, postpartum anxiety became evident through symptoms like irritability. She connected with her therapist and is still navigating those waters with grace.

147 | On their Terms - MyLin & Lindsay Stokes Kennedy

MyLin and Lindsay started their lives together after marriage with the hopes of expansion. When they decided to have more children, they were not fully aware of the obstacles they would encounter. The sticker shock regarding Intrauterine Insemination (IUI) expense steered them towards traditional or old-school insemination with a known donor. Patience over almost two years and a devastating anembryonic pregnancy would lead them to the full-term pregnancy and consequent birth of their first child together.

Lindsay chose to carry the baby, and they managed their insemination personally with advice from a fertility specialist. The fertility specialist validated their concerns and guided them through the most straightforward ways to help them. Despite having PCOS, she could make adjustments in their fertility journey and conceive. Her pregnancy was amazing, and there were no issues until the end of the pregnancy. She presented with itchy hands and feet, which was one indicator of Cholestasis. Cholestasis can affect the liver and can be dangerous for mom and baby. An induction was ordered at 37 weeks to avoid complications to their health and after two days of labor, Lennox would join the family. Shortly afterward, Lindsay developed preeclampsia and would need additional monitoring.

Postpartum for Lindsay included healing and challenges with breastfeeding. Thankfully, MyLin had started the induced lactating process prenatally with the hopes of sharing the work of feeding the baby. She was able to nourish the baby while Lindsay worked through latching issues with Baby Lennox.

MyLin’s pregnancy required more preparation as she wanted to deliver at home. They were able to have all of the birth-related services to make her dream homebirth come true with the generous support of the Victoria Project, a nonprofit organization serving Southern California. The Victoria Project provided full financial support for a midwife (not the deposit), chiropractor, pelvic floor therapy, hypnobirthing, and childbirth education.

MyLin labored with her family and doula as they awaited the intensity of active labor. Lindsay busied herself preparing the tub for her but found her work was futile. MyLin found herself in “labor land” and talked her baby out as he quickly slipped out. The midwife would arrive later and attend to the newly expanded family. She had four postpartum midwifery visits and was able to spend a lot of time in bed, healing physically and mentally.

Finding the right avenues to expand their family was pivotal in their birthing experiences. MyLin and Lindsay share their knowledge with other same-sex couples to make themselves an accessible resource. Patience, grace, and softness are essential aspects of their continued parenting journey.

144 | Letting Go of Expectations - Danielle Henderson & Shandell Rosa

Visualization is a powerful tool, especially for preparing for labor; it can turn our hopes into expectations. Much was the case for Danielle Henderson as she and her husband, Jeff, began preparing for a home birth for their first child.

Danielle created the environment she had envisioned by having calming music and lighting during her labor. The midwife arrived and was deeply committed to being present and supporting Danielle. She even had the support of her mother and sister as planned. Delivery drew out longer than they thought, and there was a family history of short or precipitous labors. However, a tilted uterus would make her work feel more intense and give the feeling that she had progressed. Her mother and sister would eventually leave as time went on. During labor, Danielle found herself coming out of her calmness and felt that hindered her progression. The next day Shandell returned to the porch awaiting the baby’s arrival. Little did she know that she would be entering the birth space. Jeff would ask her to come into the home and support the team. Shandell recalls knowing how vulnerable her sister would feel, and she cautiously stepped in and avoided looking at her to help her maintain her mindset and not face her disappointment. In a word, she held a boundary for her sister while also holding space. Despite having a nuchal arm and double wrapped umbilical cord impeding his descent, Baby Jackson would make a healthy entrance earthside in his parents’ bed.

After her birth, Danielle could feel herself detaching from the experience as she would continue to live where she had delivered her baby. Connecting memories with spaces were hard on her mentally. The newness of motherhood was an adjustment, with full support from her family, and her husband has helped with the adjustment of new motherhood.

COVID-19, Home Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierApril 28, 2022Hypnobirth, Home Birth Family, Village Support, Partner Support, Long LaborComment

139 | Birth Beyond the Status Quo - Ashlee Johnson

Ashlee Johnson's passion for birthwork grew from her first pregnancy and childbirth. She would bring forth life three times with a dedicated birth team. She welcomed being pregnant and can recall the first pregnancy as an enjoyable time despite hearing so many negative stories that people felt compelled to share with her. It would be a chance encounter, during her first pregnancy, with one woman that listened to her birth preferences and encouraged her to go for it. She let that affirmation set within her and committed to honoring her own plans.

This foundation would serve her throughout the births of her other two children. Ashlee and her husband prepared by attending birth classes and feeling fully supported in a birth center and homebirth care. She describes her births as amazing because she felt educated, had a positive attitude, and had a birth team that met her expectations. In the early postpartum days, breastfeeding was challenging due to latch issues. Yet, Having set up a solid support system, she overcame the learning curves, focused on her healing, and addressed her postpartum depression. For Ashlee, preparation is vital, expressing that no matter if birth plans shift, if you've prepared, you're in a better position to steer things your way.

131 | Unplanned Homebirth - Erica Maddox

Joining us for her second birth story share, Erica Maddox came back with a whole new set of skills as an experienced birth worker, allowing her to show up for herself in a way that helped her create an experience that helped her heal. Erica was a teen mom when she experienced early delivery with her first child. Twelve years later, she would deliver her son early, but she prepared herself for that happening, as she asked to have her cervix measured throughout the pregnancy. Awareness and preparation proved to be critical components of having the birth she wanted.

Labor would be intense and quick, but it was familiar, and Erica had called her sister to the home as she made preparations for her oldest child, whom she hadn’t planned for, to be there. Erica was intentional about not shifting the plan or boundaries with her daughter in which she had not prepared for that role. She and the baby went to the hospital, accompanied by her sister. Erica shared that she had delivered the baby at home and was coming to be checked out. The hospital staff greeted them with lots of questions and astonishment. They were ready to start their protocols, but Erica made them pause and advocated to maintain their bonding time. They relaxed a bit once they knew she was a birth worker. Her self-advocacy allowed her to maintain a gentle transition of environment for her and her newborn.

In the spirit of intentionality, Erica created a plan for her postpartum care to protect her mental and physical health. Building a healthy support system has been the key to developing a healthy family structure for their family. Removing the superwoman persona and allowing her world to shift and change as needed with grace is proving to be the best practice.

122 | To the Moon & Back - Alicia Tetteh

Alicia Tetteh joins us for a second time after sharing her twin birth with us in Episode 57: The Body Holds the Score. Alicia and her husband, Solomon, discovered they were expecting their third child during the pandemic shutdown of 2020. Luna was a surprise for them but came with a new and experienced version of Alicia.

Alicia started with a previous hospital for care but added midwifery support as she considered birthing at home. After garnering support from Solomon, she began planning an intentional homebirth with a Black midwife for the pregnancy. Despite finding a Black midwife, she had difficulty finding Black birthers who had experienced a homebirth to offer additional support. They worked towards preparation for the birth by reading and leaning into the midwife to answer her questions.

Alicia admits that there were some unrealistic expectations about laboring at home that didn’t match the visuals in her mind or on social media. Labor started after a family walk through a petting zoo. When they arrived home, Alicia found herself unable to relax and move through the pain of the contractions. Her choices regarding food, music, and creating her environment ranked high on what she was thankful for. She contributes Solomon and Jesus for her ability to deliver their baby girl at home without medication. Her previous twin birth was a surgical delivery, and she had been numbed through the physical feelings of delivery.

Preparation for birth was high on the list; however, postpartum planning took a backseat. Alicia found herself unprepared, despite the memories of her twin birth recovery. The physicality of birth was heavy on Alicia’s body. There was support from family, friends, and their doula in the first couple of weeks. After the first month, sleep routines and managing twin toddlers took over their world. Solomon and Alicia have managed their “new normal” with teamwork and genuine co-parenting. Alicia wants moms to maintain their sense of self and have an identity outside of motherhood that helps them experience the joys of life.

120 | Surviving the System - Teairra Cummings

When Teairra was pregnant with her second son, she knew right away. Once confirmed, she began preparing for a birth in which she felt that she was in control. She decided a homebirth was best and hired a midwife who was supportive of all of her decisions to navigate her pregnancy in a way that felt intuitive, safe, and liberating for her.

Late in her pregnancy, Teairra traveled with her grandmother to support her as her grandmother's son was passing. Upon returning from the trip, her midwife noticed a large amount of swelling and encouraged her that she probably shouldn't travel anymore and start bed rest. But a week after her grandmother's son passed, having spent that time on bed rest and her swelling better, Teairra decided to join her at the funeral in Missouri. On March 12, 37 weeks pregnant, while getting ready to head to the airport to return to LA, Teairra felt her water break a little. She called her sister, instructing her to let her midwife know she was heading back to and prepare to meet her at her home for the birth. Teairra's sister encouraged her to go to the hospital as she probably wouldn't make it home in time. Teairra agreed and headed with her mother to the closest hospital to their home.

She had decided to have a Lotus birth, which the hospital was not well educated about or had experience with. The nurses began using intimidation tactics to force Teairra to adhere to hospital protocols that did not serve her, her healthy son, or her birth experience. Standing firm in her choices, this medical harassment continued for two days. Speaking with her midwife in LA, she instructed her that she needed to leave the hospital or risk the hospital trying to take her baby. Her midwife walked her through what to say to hospital staff, what to get in writing so that she could sign out "Against Medical Advisement." Under immense stress and great haste, Teairra left the hospital with her mother, not expecting this fight to continue once she was home.

Being sent by the hospital staff, police began harassing Teairra's neighbors and family members of her whereabouts and surrounding her home for about a week, with DFS not letting up for an additional 30 days. On May 23rd, she was finally able to return home to LA with her son and fours years after still healing, but able to process and share while helping others on their journeys.

119 | Birthing in Light, Hope & Honesty - Alyestal Thomas

We first met Alyestal Thomas when she shared her first birth story with us (Ep. 19 |The Power Within) and were delighted when she reached out to share her second. This pregnancy would bring both mental and physical challenges for Alyestal to navigate. Her anemia had brought on intense exhaustion that would require continuous monitoring throughout her pregnancy. And while at times she would feel she had strong management of that, her mental health suffered quite a bit. Her prenatal anxiety was rising, with panic attacks about 4 to 5 times a week. She knew to be in a space to birth her baby the way she wanted to; she had to confront this challenge and be honest about it. So when she connected with her midwives, she was open with them about how she was feeling about her pregnancy. They were able to connect her with a therapist to unpack her feelings and fear. Therapy affirmed the challenges of being pregnant during a pandemic paired with not always having her husband present when she needed his support and advocacy. And that she was allowed the space to grieve missing and losing expectations that she had for this pregnancy.

With her first birth, Alyestal experienced a TV-worthy breaking of her waters. A concern she had this time around is that this wouldn't be the case, and she wouldn't know when she was in labor. However, a week before her daughter was due; she had another TV-worthy breaking of her waters. COntractions were a bit inconsistent, but she reached out to her midwives to keep them informed. As labor progressed, she and her midwives decided their arrival would be best. When they arrived at 1:30 am, they did a cervical check, and Alyestal was 2cm dilated. After some discussion about the next steps, she consented to a stretch and sweep. Her midwives left and instructed her to call when she felt they were needed again. That call came at 2:30 am with the midwives arriving at 3 am - and Alyestal soon after meeting her daughter 4 mins to 5 am. When describing her birth, Alyestal expresses that "birth was everything that didn't know she wanted it to be and birth was everything she wanted it to be." Feelings that she wishes for every birthing individual to feel - a sense of comfort and ease.

117 | Staying Present - Annette Perel

Before the pregnancy of her son, Annette Perel had been a doula for about four years. Considering her experience from supporting other families, she was set on the plans for her birth and what she needed to do to prepare. Key aspects of that preparation included hiring a doula and midwife for her home birth, learning to become assertive in her communication to advocate for herself, and soaking in the joy of her pregnancy.

Not able to turn her doula hat off, Annette was sure that her son would be coming past his estimated due date. Thanksgiving evening, she was surprised as she began noticing some early signs of labor but pushed them off as she could move through contractions with ease. That night she was even able to sleep through them. Over the next two days, she would fall into a rhythm of working through manageable contractions throughout the day that would subside in the evening and morning. Annette and her son's father took that time to complete the last preparation before his arrival.

Moving into day three, labor would begin to shift and become more intense, Annette needing to lean into the support of her son's father and doula. Staying present in her birth was very important for her - an anchor that allowed her to connect with her baby and body, serving as a technique for managing labor and allowing her to trust herself. This would be vital as Annette delivered her baby into her own hands with the support of her doula and midwife, who was providing guidance via phone (as she was still making her way to Annette). A moment she describes as feeling "guided, protected, safe and exactly how that labor was supposed to happen."

Home Birth, PostpartumLaurel GourrierAugust 3, 2021Black Doulas, Doula Support, Home Birth Family, Village Support, Trust BirthComment

116 | Healing From Within - Tiffany & Krystle Smith

Tiffany shared her birth story and reflections on her journey through a rough pregnancy, being sent home from the hospital, resulting in unassisted home birth, and how her healing from it all continues 11 years later.

Labor thrives best in an environment where the birthing person feels safe, secure, and supported. The environment should be comfortable and consistent with minimal interruptions. These factors were challenging to grasp for Tiffany as she didn't know where she would be or who would help her deliver her child. Tiffany's managed her labor at home as she leaned into family support. When contractions reached 5-10 minutes apart, she called the hospital, and she was encouraged to report there. Upon her arrival, she discovered she was dilated 2cm. She chose to stay at the hospital and walk until she felt a shift. She was rechecked with some progress and informed the provider that she wanted to stay due to how intense her labor felt and how far her home was. The medical providers were dismissive and wanted to send her home. Eventually, her sister took her home, and she continued to manage her labor at home on her own. Tiffany had the urge to push as she entered her bathroom, and she pushed her son out over her toilet - 3 hours of leaving the hospital. Tiffany managed to wake her mother and call 911, and they were instructed to clear the baby's airway and tie off the umbilical cord. Tiffany and her son were picked up by the ambulance and went to a local emergency room. Aftercare had to be taken over by the first hospital. The hospital stated they were full and led her to yet another hospital. Tiffany suspects that the initial hospital was full, and that's why they sent her home. She only wished they had informed her of that then, as she had not planned to give birth at home, essentially by herself.

Planned home birth with medical support or an unassisted birth planned is not the same as unexpectedly delivering your first child at home. Tiffany and her son were neglected and left vulnerable to adverse birth outcomes. Tiffany is still working on healing through the traumatic birth of her child. The intrusive thoughts of her value in this world haunt her. Healing is not a linear process, and we are thankful for her share. We hope that her story reaches the ears of those working in birth spaces, and they are convicted to not only think about their practices but also do the work and realign with what birth work should be.

115 | Intuitive Solitude - Lauren Collins

Dr. Lauren Collins, a chiropractor, and birthworker tapped into the wisdom and experiences of the families she's supported over the years and empowered her during her homebirth. A birth that was peaceful, intense, and also faster than expected.

The day her labor started, she started to busy herself but again felt led to rest. She eventually became restless and began to move through her contractions. Lauren's doula and husband helped her with position changes and comfort measures. She utilized her home to her advantage to maintain a relaxed state of mind. Allowing is a state of mind that releases our minds from overworking so the body can work during labor according to its design. Her son would come much faster than expected for a first-time birthing parent. The birth team was not there yet as she was "pushy." Realizing her midwife would not make it in time to catch, Lauren tapped into her connection with her son. She said, "Ok, we just have to figure this out now." Her doula Facetimed the midwife to provide virtual support as Lauren successfully delivered her son into her arms in the shower. Lauren credits her preparation with her birthing team and some of the books she read during pregnancy for how she managed her labor despite not marking the typical milestones that she has seen in labors. Allowing space for solitude was vital in keeping her labor moving forward organically.

The difficulty in healing was more challenging for Lauren than the birth itself, partly due to her expectations. Learning to rely on other people as she healed proved to be an important opportunity to learn to give herself permission to seek support. Birth teams are critical to the success and overall positive experience of labor. Access to out-of-hospital birth has some obstacles, but whatever is in your power to control, build your team to meet those needs.

104 | Choosing Joy - Dadriaunna Hayes

Dae joined us to share her beautifully intertwined birth stories of loss and joy reclaimed. She experienced the unexpected loss of her first child during the early part of her third trimester. She began a healing journey that included therapy, where she started journaling. The process proved therapeutic and taught her how to make space for herself and rebuild her trust in God.

Dae worked through the waves of grief and discovered she was pregnant again; this time, it was during a pandemic. She gathered her team, created an active morning routine, and simply chose to enjoy the pregnancy. They planned for a birth at home and put in the work to make it happen by hiring a midwife and doula. After managing through over 20 hours of labor, they decided to transition to the hospital. She continued to labor without progressing and found herself at peace at how birth would unfold and welcomed her son via surgical birth.

Dae has adopted a belief of motherhood as a joyous experience. She has developed a community online that has centered the scripture referencing beauty for ashes. She is now holding space for women who have experienced some form of loss and want to exchange that grief for a new experience of joy and beauty.

100 |Prepare and Let Go - Leslie Lissant & Caryn Fields

Leslie had started preparing for parenthood by learning as much as she could and discovered many pathways for birth, parenting, and creating a home environment that would be different from her own life experience. She had learned about homebirth in college and kept the knowledge in her mind until she and her husband, Carvens, were expecting their own child. They hired Caryn as additional support but found that she would be there for unexpected aspects of pregnancy. She found herself vulnerable and needing reassurance as she managed pregnancy during a pandemic and racial unrest in our country.

Leslie sought grounding and joy through the uncertainties of the environment. When her labor ensued, she committed to her affirmations, breathing, and leaning into her support. Learning to surrender to that space and moment allowed her to power through. And birth her baby into her arms. Leslie refers to her birth experience as a “posture of gratitude.”

Home Birth, COVID-19Laurel GourrierApril 29, 2021Home Birth Family, Midwifery Care, Doula of Color, Postpartum Planning, COVID-19Comment

97 | Trusting the Power of Intuitive Listening - Jefri & Aigbokhai

For Jefri prepping for birth mentally, emotionally, and spiritually was of high importance. Tapping into her intuition and "reconciling her relationship with pain" based on conscious and unconscious thoughts around it. She wanted to be able to trust herself throughout her whole journey, an aspect of preparation that was key for Aigbokhai as well—finding a way to stay out of his own head so that he could be "in the moment, present and available" to support Jefri in whatever way she needed.

When labor began, Jefri felt as though it wasn't time. As things started picking up, she still disregarded the shift but followed her body's request for movement as she worked through contractions. After some time, she found herself returning to the toilet, her body signaling to her that their baby would be arriving soon.

With a sense of haste, she instructed Aigbokhai to call their midwife, and they both began hurriedly preparing for the baby to come. With their midwife still a bit of way from their home and things moving fast, they placed her and Jefri's mother on facetime. Both of them providing support and encouragement as the baby began crowning. And with another two contractions, their son was born into Jefri and Aigbokhai's hands.

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